Learn how to step out of the state of depression, so that you can express your potential, feel alive, and enjoy life.
“In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.” – Albert Camus
In depression, we feel frozen. We feel deep desperation. We feel disappointed. Life is not flowing and moving. It’s not uncommon to feel self-loathing and even aggression directed toward the self. We feel guilty. We feel unfree.
In depression, we feel that life is moving without us. We are isolated in our prison of no-flow. We feel abandoned by life itself. Often we can even name countless blessings in our lives, but none of those can fill the void. We may even feel guilty for that. We feel alone. We are trying to ask the right questions but we somehow always end up feeling meaningless.
Depression has its roots. And it is protecting us from something. There is a reason why our response is immobilization. We said “no“ to life and froze because something was unbearable to cope with. Our body remembers it.
The first step is always the most important one. In depression, we feel like we need to fight it and often criticize ourselves for feeling down. We want to change, but we tend to be hard on ourselves. We feel like there is no way out. We may even experience deep layers of aggression.
The part of us that wants to fix depression is promoting it. The part of us that criticizes us constantly is trying to protect us from something and is keeping us in depression.
Depression shows up in our life for a reason, it is a response. It is a coping mechanism. It wants to show us something. Or someone who needs our attention.
The hurt, the pain, and the trauma need to feel someone who lives deeply buried underneath depression.
There is a part of us that wants to live and be in the flow of life. We are not depression. There is nothing broken inside of us that needs to be fixed. To go beyond depression means to connect ourselves to the part of us that was never out of the flow of life.
That part is inside of us. We don’t need to make it up. It’s underneath the pain, the sadness, the anger, and the guilt.
Once that part washes us with compassion and safety, we can allow the emotions to flow.
If we allow all emotions, including sadness and anger without trying to change them, but rather accept them, and breathe with them, they will eventually bring us to a state of aliveness.
The part of us that is here for us, and not the one that is trying to fix us, is what will eventually bring healing. Even though it’s hard to believe it, life is always flowing for us. When we move with our feelings, allow them to be, and gently invite them to join us in the flow, they will find the light in the darkness. To heal depression we must first remember that we are the light.
“You shall be free indeed when your days are not without a care nor your nights without a want and a grief. But rather when these things girdle your life and yet you rise above them naked and unbound.” – Khalil Gibran
Who is this for?
This is for you if you:
– can’t remember the last time you felt joy
– feel like your life has no meaning
– often feel guilty for not feeling okay
– feel the so-called collective pain
– can’t remember the last time you felt like you belong
– look at other people and don’t understand where they find the meaning to life
– feel like time stands still
– feel like you can’t move or that the way you feel will never change
– feel deep desperation and don’t know how to get out of it
– already have experience in psychotherapy or other self-development methods
What will you get?
– develop a deeper understanding of the potentials that are inside of you
– have the realization that there is life on the other side of depression
– learn how to say “yes“ to yourself and “yes“ to life
– learn how to express yourself and what you feel
– gain clarity on what is the meaning of depression
– understand what is the shadow and how to work with it
– become aware of inner qualities that were suppressed
– receive a high-quality self-development approach, based on body-oriented-psychotherapy
– become aware of the inner conflict
– learn movement and experiential practices
– feel the taste of inner freedom
– create a clear intention to experience more bliss and ease
– get to know and understand yourself on a deeper level
– discover the ability to feel safe, nourished, free, open, and flowing
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Repression of Expression Creates Depression
The key step in any healing is self-love and self-acceptance. As long as there is a part of us that wants to change us, fix us, or perfect us, chances are we will not heal. At least not for the long run. When we are in a total acceptance of self, which does not mean we have to agree with all our thoughts and behaviors, we are in the flow. Depression can be an unconscious resistance to the flow.
One of the ways to go beyond depression is to allow ourselves to feel the natural expression of our being. That may seem scary and vulnerable at first. Life without expression, flow, and movement is no life.
The guilt, the shame, and the self-loathing that depression brings are all part of our effort to control the flow. Why do we do it? Because we feel that if we completely allow the flow, we will find ourselves to be everything that we don’t like or even hate about ourselves. And yes, the flow brings some of our old, unintegrated shadow parts, but underneath is also something else – our pure creativity.
In the beginning, our flow can feel painful. It starts defrosting and moving immobilization. That means that we need to allow ourselves to feel everything that we are neglecting and suppressing. That is why it is so important to find a safe space within. That is why we must begin our journey with our essence and inner resources. The calling for integration always comes from the essence. The mentor that prepares us to face the dragon is inside of us.
As we allow ourselves to move with the flow, sooner or later, we will come across aliveness, creativity, and freedom.
True freedom is a non-resistance to life. We naturally want to live. Life is in our flesh and bones. That is why the body is an incredible tool to start allowing the flow. The body is raw and honest. It is clear, and it brings to the surface repression, manipulation, and control our mind was trying to protect us with.
The body is also a resource that can bring safety, pleasure, and richness one can dream about. Our nature is what will eventually set us free.
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I’m Lana. I want to share with you one story that came through me at a moment when I felt like life had lost all meaning. This story represents that life is in its nature simple, easy, and honest. It has one purpose. To move. Life is constantly shifting, moving, and renewing. There is no death in life. The only fear that is worse than the fear of death is the fear of life. The reason why we fear life is because we fear our energy.
The Reason to Live
It was one of those days… I felt like nothing was going right. It wasn’t just about my current situation, it was about my entire life. Nothing made sense anymore. Yes, the darkness paid me a little visit. You see, when you dive into the darkness you truly can’t see the light. It has the power to consume you and to convince you that it is the only thing that exists. This was not the first time I’ve seen my darkness, oh no, I knew very well my dark aspect. We sort of had a relationship. An abusive one to be honest, but a relationship. I knew how to handle it. You see, I considered myself a swimmer, a swimmer of my psyche. I was able to dive deep, but I would always float back to the surface.
This time something was different. I had reached the bottom. That was it. Nothing there anymore. Nothing to be fixed, nothing to heal, no wound. Just a big hole. I was done. I was completely done with this whole game called life. I just couldn’t see the point of it anymore. We are born, raised by families who are consumed by their issues, go to school where we are taught how to obey, we are looking for jobs to get money, oh yes, so that we can buy our existence, we are dating, hopefully we fall in love, but end up disappointed and heartbroken, just so we can have children and teach them all of this nonsense. That is how I felt. I was so done. Not me, I didn’t want this.
Someone looking from the outside could call it a depression, but it wasn’t about it. I honestly, rationally, didn’t see the point of sticking around here. And yes, it wasn’t all that bad. You can always have a job that you love. You can have amazing friends and a kind partner. And you know what? I had all of that. But I was still fighting my way through. I was nowhere near freedom. I wanted to fly. I wanted to be free. It was too much. So I decided to do the only thing I could do in a tough moment like this. I took a deep breath. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to feel the presence of my soul. If anybody knew how to be free, it was her.
– What the hell?? – my soul said pretty angrily – You know what girl? You gotta chill. Your thoughts are exhausting me! – Yes, I know… My soul did not sound what you would have imagined a soul to sound like.
– But soul, I am desperate. I am unhappy. I think I want to go. – I cried.
– Go where? What’s the deal now? Is it a job now? No, wait, I know. Money issues? It’s always the same girl. You’re never gonna learn. Just allow and relax. Look at me. You will need to learn how to enjoy if you want to stick around. – she said.
– But that’s the thing soul. I am done. I don’t want abundance, I don’ want a job, I don’t need anything. I just want to go. This whole experience has been a big struggle. And I just can’t take it anymore. – I said.
– Girl, it’s a struggle because you are constantly playing the same game and it is draining you. But where do you think you will go? – my soul asked.
-You mean after I die? I don’t know. Somewhere where I will finally be free. And where you and I will always be together. – I said.
–You got that right. Let me tell you something, girl. You wanna die? It’s your choice. Do you really want it? Hell, I can make it happen. And you know where will you go? Remember your dreams when you were a kid? Unicorns and angels? It’s all real. Is that what you want? – my soul asked.
Yes, I do! – I said with excitement.
– Okay, as you wish. But, first I want you to do something for me. – my soul said.
– What is it? – I asked.
– I want you to go and find one reason to live. Just one. I’m sure a smart girl like you won’t have a problem with such a small task. – my soul chuckled.
– Oh man, I mean, oh soul. But just one? And how am I supposed to do that? – I asked irritated.
– Go and do whatever you humans do when you celebrate life. – my soul answered.
At that moment I was alone again. The reason to live? Is it love? Nature? Traveling? Everything is just not worth the trouble. What does she want for me? I got so angry. I didn’t know what to do with so much anger, so I started to move. I started to move my body in the rhythm of my anger. It wasn’t pretty but it was. My body was shaking as my legs and arms were completely uncoordinated, trying to break free. I followed my inner rhythm. After some time of regular human emotions, I fell into nothingness. I could feel that my body was moving, but I was nothing other than a breath and a heartbeat. I heard an echo of my heartbeat going into other realities and coming back to me. It was a pure feeling of “I exist.“ I felt my entire body as oneness. My heart became so overwhelmed that I broke into tears. Tears of joy. The joy of existence. I knew that was it.
My body is the reason to live. My body is a celebration of life, my soul knew that. If I go, I would have to leave my body. No more sensuality of my skin, joy in my heart, pleasure in my pelvis, presence of my feet. I got it. I wasn’t done with life. I was just done with the old way. The human way. But maybe I just opened the door to a new way. A way of the soul. It’s not about what we have or who we meet, or even what we accomplish. With that, I was done for sure. But in this realized moment I knew that we came here to enjoy life. As I took another deep breath I could see my soul smiling.
– You finally get it. You are one with me in your every experience, if you just allow it. – she said. I was finally in peace. Where we will go from here, only time will tell. But I knew I wanted to stay and find out.
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(Disclaimer: This is not a substitute for medical treatment, psychotherapy, or medication. Participants must take full responsibility for their physical and psychological well-being during the program. This program is not a cure for F.32 Depression. If you are suffering from severe depression and/or are experiencing suicidal thoughts, find a psychiatrist in your community immediately. It is recommended that participants already have experience in self-development.)
1. Movement and nourishment
We will learn how to become aware of our sensations, feelings, emotions, and the overall state of our bodies. We will explore how energies can be released, observed, and regulated through movement and nourishment. Acceptance, regulation, and inner resources will be guides during the entire process. We will find the aliveness that never left our bodies. Whether we are aware of it or not, our heart is constantly beating, our lungs are constantly breathing, and there is a constant movement of life inside of us.
2. The Expression
In depression, we are using all of our energy not to express ourselves. This can be dreading and uncomfortable. We will learn how to go step by step and see what is there inside of us that wants to live, express, and flow.
3. Saying “Yes” and “No” to life
Life is fairly simple. We are either saying “yes“ or we are saying “no.“ There is no guilt in that. In this module, we will allow and feel the pattern of our “no,” and without trying to change it, we will bring in the “yes“ also. The part that is alive and aligned with our higher potentials.
4. Idealized Self, shadow, and the essence
In this module, we will introduce the 3 parts of our being. We will explore why and how they operate in our lives, both consciously and unconsciously, why it is important to understand our shadow, what the idealized self is and why we use it, and what our essence is and how we can embody it in our life.
In this module, we will learn that life is not just about surviving, but rather living. We will learn what are our unique qualities, what is our authentic expression, and how to show up in and for life. We will allow ourselves to shine our light.
6. Surrendering to the flow
The last part is a deliberate choice to be in the flow. It’s a daily choice. When we are in the flow, we don’t need to fight, control, or focus on it. It simply is. It always is. Our energy always responds to our consciousness. All we have to do is choose it and allow it.
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Will there be individual sessions?
No, unfortunately, individual sessions are not a part of this program.
Is this psychotherapy?
No, this is not psychotherapy, although this program has some exercises and techniques that stem from body-oriented psychotherapy.
Will this program expire?
This program is not conducted live, nor will it expire. You can participate at your own pace.
(Photos source: Pixabey)